Hello! :)
I was having a wonderful (normal) day today.
Actually, I came down to lunch, and apparently EVERYONE had a Lunch A on Day 3, so all of my friends were in the cafeteria at once. Not to mention, the cafeteria is almost always exclusively freshmen (ooooh exclusive), but today it was raining, so a bunch of people were crowding in the small cafeteria.
Basically, I came to my usual table, and everyone starts shuffling to make room for me (all 10 people), and then Maia says for everyone to move to the table next to ours, because it's bigger, and across the cafeteria we could see 3 more people of the usual group joining us. Everyone sort of groaned and didn't really move. I left my lunch in my locker, so I ran back upstairs (all the way to 4th floor!!!), and got my lunch.
By the time I got back to the table, everyone but my friends Serena and Brian had moved to the next table. I sort of felt bad, because there wasn't really room at the other table either, so I sat with them. My lunch was fun (I ran out of bread chip things and I had to eat the last of my hummus with my finger!), but more and more people started coming to the table, because of lack of space and what-not.
It was fine, most the people were people I knew and was friends with. But, I sort of looked around, and started cracking up, because I seemed to be seated at the exclusively Asian table. Seriously. Everyone. Was. Asian.
That was sort of funny to me.
I noticed something about which classes I enjoy more, compared to which classes I enjoy least. I enjoy Algebra 1, because the people there are great. My teacher has a great sense of humor, and the people in the class are awesome. I also feel like I learn a lot there. I enjoy L.A. Lit., because the teacher is absolutely hilarious (like stomach ache, you can't breathe hilarious), and because, as usual, the class is a great group.
My day was going well...
Anyways, my school day concluded with the death of my high spirits. No one probably really noticed, I shook it off and kept smiling, but the latter portion of my day was quite horrible.
There was a time, when I was maybe 5, when I think I hit another girl in my class. She cut me in line or something, and she took my folder and wouldn't give it back, so I hit her. I didn't hit her hard or anything, and I didn't mean to. She told on me, and my teacher sort of just told me not to hit people. She didn't yell at me or anything. But, I felt really horrible about hitting this person. I heard the little girl tell some of the other kids that I hit her, and I started crying. I felt really horrible, because I knew that I did hit the girl, and now everyone knew of my bad deed.
Today was like that. Except, I didn't hit anyone. I didn't hit anyone, but of course the scenario of the little girl telling the other children is still relevant. I don't know what to do.
High school is about getting a clean slate. It is about getting the chance to form people's opinions of you from scratch. Whatever opinion they make of you, is all your own, and you are in charge of that. I feel like I have been cheated from that clean slate. Now, my board already says something, and I didn't write it.
Now, taking a step back, and analyzing a similar situation, I know exactly what I would think.
If the story were about a girl getting pregnant, I would think, "Well, don't get pregnant!"
If the story were about a person wearing skimpy clothing, I would think, "Well, don't wear skimpy clothing!"
If the story were about drunk driving, I would think, "Well, don't get drunk!"
This story isn't like the one from when I was 5. I would probably just tell 5-year-old me not to hit other children. But, I didn't hit any other children, so?
My point is that, even though the writing on my board is minuscule, and no one will probably see it, I feel horrible. I feel like one of the only advantages of going to a new school has been taken. But, who are you to take away that advantage? that privilege?
Alas, I will be fine. I actually don't really care too much about it at all, because I know what kind of impression I leave on people, and I don't think very much can tamper with your own eyesight. Especially not gossip.
All I have to remind myself to do is "D.F.T.B.A."
Don't Forget To Be Awesome
-Mina;)
I was having a wonderful (normal) day today.
Actually, I came down to lunch, and apparently EVERYONE had a Lunch A on Day 3, so all of my friends were in the cafeteria at once. Not to mention, the cafeteria is almost always exclusively freshmen (ooooh exclusive), but today it was raining, so a bunch of people were crowding in the small cafeteria.
Basically, I came to my usual table, and everyone starts shuffling to make room for me (all 10 people), and then Maia says for everyone to move to the table next to ours, because it's bigger, and across the cafeteria we could see 3 more people of the usual group joining us. Everyone sort of groaned and didn't really move. I left my lunch in my locker, so I ran back upstairs (all the way to 4th floor!!!), and got my lunch.
By the time I got back to the table, everyone but my friends Serena and Brian had moved to the next table. I sort of felt bad, because there wasn't really room at the other table either, so I sat with them. My lunch was fun (I ran out of bread chip things and I had to eat the last of my hummus with my finger!), but more and more people started coming to the table, because of lack of space and what-not.
It was fine, most the people were people I knew and was friends with. But, I sort of looked around, and started cracking up, because I seemed to be seated at the exclusively Asian table. Seriously. Everyone. Was. Asian.
That was sort of funny to me.
I noticed something about which classes I enjoy more, compared to which classes I enjoy least. I enjoy Algebra 1, because the people there are great. My teacher has a great sense of humor, and the people in the class are awesome. I also feel like I learn a lot there. I enjoy L.A. Lit., because the teacher is absolutely hilarious (like stomach ache, you can't breathe hilarious), and because, as usual, the class is a great group.
My day was going well...
Anyways, my school day concluded with the death of my high spirits. No one probably really noticed, I shook it off and kept smiling, but the latter portion of my day was quite horrible.
There was a time, when I was maybe 5, when I think I hit another girl in my class. She cut me in line or something, and she took my folder and wouldn't give it back, so I hit her. I didn't hit her hard or anything, and I didn't mean to. She told on me, and my teacher sort of just told me not to hit people. She didn't yell at me or anything. But, I felt really horrible about hitting this person. I heard the little girl tell some of the other kids that I hit her, and I started crying. I felt really horrible, because I knew that I did hit the girl, and now everyone knew of my bad deed.
Today was like that. Except, I didn't hit anyone. I didn't hit anyone, but of course the scenario of the little girl telling the other children is still relevant. I don't know what to do.
High school is about getting a clean slate. It is about getting the chance to form people's opinions of you from scratch. Whatever opinion they make of you, is all your own, and you are in charge of that. I feel like I have been cheated from that clean slate. Now, my board already says something, and I didn't write it.
Now, taking a step back, and analyzing a similar situation, I know exactly what I would think.
If the story were about a girl getting pregnant, I would think, "Well, don't get pregnant!"
If the story were about a person wearing skimpy clothing, I would think, "Well, don't wear skimpy clothing!"
If the story were about drunk driving, I would think, "Well, don't get drunk!"
This story isn't like the one from when I was 5. I would probably just tell 5-year-old me not to hit other children. But, I didn't hit any other children, so?
My point is that, even though the writing on my board is minuscule, and no one will probably see it, I feel horrible. I feel like one of the only advantages of going to a new school has been taken. But, who are you to take away that advantage? that privilege?
Alas, I will be fine. I actually don't really care too much about it at all, because I know what kind of impression I leave on people, and I don't think very much can tamper with your own eyesight. Especially not gossip.
All I have to remind myself to do is "D.F.T.B.A."
Don't Forget To Be Awesome
-Mina;)
D.F.T.B.A., Multiplication in Nasty Accents! Whatever rumor or misconception or first impression has been made of you, just make sure to show people who you truly are. If you never show them how wrong they are, they will acknowledge you out of the corner of their mind as "The Girl Who Did That" or "The Girl Who Said That." If you stand out and show off the real you, NO ONE CAN TOUCH YOU.
ReplyDelete~Gracie
p.s. Advice: Read Stargirl. This book will help you with this specific problem. This book is a blessing to teens in America.
Thanks!
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